How to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life in your 20’s

Dear fellow Millennials,

I have a confession to make. It’s about my pet peeve. Only a handful knows about it at this point, but I feel compelled to share it with my readers now. Whenever I hear someone say “I have time to kill,” this really ticks me off. In fact, it infuriates me. Don’t get me wrong. I understand sometimes doing nothing helps recharge our batteries from the excessive consumption of energy that our life demands us, but really I am talking about those who habitually engage themselves in nothingness. No purpose. No intention – just extra time to kill. Osbert Sitwell once said, “In reality, killing time is only the name for another of the multifarious ways by which Time kills us.” I couldn’t have said it better than Sitwell.

Five days ago, I turned 26. A great benefit of birthdays reminds me to take a step back from my busy world and hit the pause button in my life. I usually take 30,000 steps back to see the path of my journey. It’s pretty amazing when you do this something I highly recommend.

Remember the latest extraordinary feat the daredevil jumper Felix Baumgartner made, free-falling as he broke the sound barrier? Baumgartner rode a balloon to the edge of space approximately 24 miles high above ground level. Imagine how the earth would look like from his vantage point prior to his jump. Completely different from the ground level, of course. Think about life from this level.

Now, let me ask you this question. Please think about it.

How much time do I really have until I die?

This isn’t a trick question. I’m 26. So, let’s say I have around 60 more years to live if I’m optimistic. Let’s round the number to 85 years on earth. Paul Sohn, 1986-2071. Sounds like a lot of years. But, let you tell you why this thinking is deceptive, in reality. Let’s break down the next 60 years:

85 years turns out to be 1020 months or roughly 31,000 days. I’m already 26 years (312 months) old. So, I have roughly 59 years (708 months) left.

Sleeping – People spend an average of one third of their lives sleeping (8 hours). So, out of the 708 months, I only am left with 469 months (39 years) where I’m actually awake.

Bathroom – Considering people spend more than 20 minutes every day in a bathroom, this seems trivial from a ‘ground level’ perspective. Yet, if you add up, this amounts to 6.48 months from now to when I’m 85. That leaves me with 460 months (38.4 years) left.

Eating – Eating is essential. Suppose people eat three meals per day, taking roughly 2 hours per day eating, this amounts to (38 months) 3.24 years in life. I’m down to 422 months (35.1 years).

Waiting – Research shows an average person spends about 5 years waiting in line and queues (i.e., 6 months waiting for traffic lanes). Since I’ve lived 26 years already, I’ll estimate that I have about 3 years (36 months) waiting a line. This leaves me to a mere 386 months. (32.1 years)

Working – Say that I retire at the age of 60, I have 34 years left to work. Working the next 260 days each year for 40 hours per week, I will be spending around 93 months (7.75 years) working. This leaves me with 293 months (24.4 years).

Entertainment – Studies show that people watch an average 5 hours of TV per day. With the rise of social media people are spending an increasing time on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr etc. This amounts to 76 months (6.3 years). I have a mere 217 months (18 years) left. A shocking 18 years!

Taking out all this sunk time, I am left with 18 years. This adds to a mere 13% of time from now till I die.  Now, out of these 18 years, I must strive to be balance the competing demands as a husband, father, friend, and many more roles I engage in life etc. Here’s another way to think about this. I probably have less than 5 times to see my grandparents. I have less than 100 times to see my best friends. This gave me goosebumps.

Now, the billion dollar question: How will you spend the next 18 years on earth? To answer this, you first must answer another question: What matters to you MOST? Everyone talks about the importance of time management. What people fail to understand is unless you have a clear understanding of your priorities, time management becomes nothing but a rat race. (Read my post on

A professor stood before his class and had some items in front of him. When class began, wordlessly he picked up a large empty jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks right to the top, rocks about 2″ diameter.

He then asked the students if the jar was full? They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them in to the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks. The students laughed.

He asked his students again if the jar was full? They agreed that yes,it was.

The professor then picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

“Now,” said the professor, “I want you to recognize that this is your life.

The rocks are the important things – your family, your partner, your health, your children -anything that is so important to you that if it were lost, you would be nearly destroyed.

The pebbles are the other things in life that matter, but on a smaller scale. The pebbles represent things like your job, house, or car.

The sand is everything else, the “small stuff.”

“If you put the sand or the pebbles into the jar first, there is no room for the rocks.

The same goes for your life. If you spend all your energy and time on the small stuff, material things, you will never have room for the things that are truly most important.

Pay attention to the things that are Important in your life and spend time on the Important.

Some of the Important’s are (as a follower of Christ):

1. Spreading the Gospel of Jesus in all my endeavors

2. Being a Salt and Light who serves, equips, and transforms emerging Mind Molders of our society

3. To be a man of love, authenticity, and wisdom

What about you? What are your most Importants?

Please comment below on this blog post!